Have you ever felt full of energy thinking about the exciting future but then felt lost because you don’t know where that’s coming from?
I’ve been there. And I know it’s really confusing and frustrating.
It’s actually hard to explain because people usually get motivated AFTER they had an amazing idea, not the other way around.
Last year (and the year before that, and the one before that too) I was EXCITED. I’d recently discovered my passion for business so I started learning everything I could about the subject, thinking it was an important foundation to become a successful entrepreneur.
I was delighted about it all when I suddenly realized I had no idea what my successful business was going to be about.
I found myself confused and lost because even though I was dying to have a blooming and wonderful business, I didn’t know where to start.
It took me a lot of time to find my way and start uncovering my true purpose. It’s been a loooong road and I’m not even there yet.
Today I’m going to share with you what I’ve learned along this process.
If you have an unstoppable drive within yourself and you feel this powerful force pushing you to achieve “something”, keep reading, this one’s for you.
We’ve already learned the basics of how to build a mindset strong enough to face challenges; about how to build confidence from scratch, fight self-doubt, build habits and more.
Now we’re going to talk about passion, purpose, desires.
The first thing you want to do (if you haven’t yet) if you want to move forward to the right direction is to acknowledge that you want more.
You need to feel that unstoppable force in your bones and embrace it. Tell yourself all that energy is not going to go waste. You’re going to use it to turn your life into the life you desire.
Then, you’ll need to embark on a very personal journey: discovering what you want.
Let’s talk about how to discover your purpose. Although instead of “discover” I’d use the word “uncover”.
Not knowing what to do with your life
Many people say they don’t know what they want from life.
Maybe you’re one of them and you keep wondering how to find your passion.
You state you have no idea what you want to do.
Let me tell you, with all due respect, I firmly believe that’s A LIE.
You already know what you want! It’s written all over yourself.
We all have that spark inside us and if it sounds cheesy to you, don’t mind the cheesiness, just listen.
You’re just too embarrassed to admit what you want. You’re afraid to say it out loud even to yourself because you think you don’t deserve it. You think it’s just a wild dream of yours that’s not worth pursuing.
And that’s why I prefer to say “uncover” rather than “discover” your purpose.
Your purpose and the life you desire is covered by embarrassment, uncertainty, anxiety, and fear.
So, yes, I believe you DO know what you want.
You’ve probably found yourself daydreaming thinking about someone else’s cool life. Take that as a sign. You probably want to be like them or live the life they live in.
I’m certain there’s someone you look up to. Or that there’s something that powerfully gets your attention every time but you’re sure it’s just a hobby or something you could “try one day”.
What’s that thing you do that makes you lose track of time?
Practice journaling to find your purpose
If you have a hard time uncovering what you really want, what your life purpose is or what’s best for you right now, I highly recommend you try journaling for 7-10 days straight.
Write about everything that comes to your mind. You’ll probably write about “urgent” things first and that’s ok. We want to do some brain dump before we can really get into the juicy stuff your brain’s been hiding.
After you’ve written about current life affairs and such, start writing about things you like. It doesn’t matter if they seem related or not.
Think about the last time you did something that made you really excited. Or about something you’ve been dying to try lately.
Write about a vision of your future self that gets you excited. What do you see yourself doing in 5 years? Describe the picture in detail.
Write about people you admire. Write about your role models. What makes them hold that position in your mind and life? Is it their personality, their achievements, their lifestyle?
Beware of thoughts that trick you into believing other people are superior beings capable of achieving much more than you can (they’re not!), like
- I admire XXXX so much, but I could never do what he/she does, I’m not XXXX enough.
- Sure, XXXX’s life is great but he/she was obviously born in a wealthy family.
- I wish I could be as successful as XXXX, but I was born/I live in a complicated country/situation, so I could never do what he/she did.
After practicing this technique for a week or two, focusing on your desires, you’ll be able to recognize patterns that’ll guide you on your self-discovery journey towards your passions.
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Make passion meet purpose
“Passion” is not everything when it comes to setting important, long-term goals.
I’d say it’s not even relevant because passion is a feeling and no feeling is permanent. Feelings always change. So I’d say “purpose” beats “passion” on that one.
Nevertheless, your gut feeling may tell you something important about what you really want.
Feeling passionate about something can be a powerful indicator of the path you should follow.
Learn more: 25 solid steps to find your passion
I strongly believe no one can get really far in life without enjoying the outcomes of their daily efforts.
You can finish Law School to please your parents, but I doubt you’ll ever become the most successful lawyer in history.
Forget about endless happiness
Let’s talk about this topic for a bit.
I don’t believe happiness is the main goal in life. I’d say inner peace and feeling useful is.
When you devote your life to things you find futile and you feel completely useless, you can end up being not just deeply unhappy, but also very anxious, aggressive and full of pain.
Many people believe Nirvana equals doing something “they love” ALL. THE. TIME.
But you know what? Thinking like that is for losers.
“Endless happiness” could actually be stopping you from getting the things you want AND from admitting what you want.
If you deeply believe you need to be happy all the time, then you won’t ever do things that make you proud because most of the time, if not all the time, serving your life purpose entails doing things YOU HATE.
Maybe you want to start a YouTube channel, for example, because you love teaching and you love talking to people about things you know about, but you hate everything related to technical stuff like cameras and editing programs.
You could end up thinking that the fact that you hate such an essential part of that goal actually means it’s not meant for you. And that makes you believe you don’t really want a YouTube channel after all.
If you really wanted one you’d be willing to happily complete every single task related to it, right?
Well, you’re drop-dead wrong.
To illustrate this, I’m going to use a real example of my life.
I love writing and I love storytelling, but I don’t really like designing things. It makes me anxious because I enjoy beautiful design and I admire people who design amazing things but it’s hard for me to get it right because I’M NOT A DESIGNER.
Designers are magical creatures in my mind, actually.
However, I started a blog so I could write, but I was sure that in order to do that, I’d also need to do things that stress me out, like picking a layout, designing pins for Pinterest and so on.
And that’s fine.
I know someday I’ll be able to afford an amazing designer capable of capturing my personality in aimlief’s design but for now it’s all DIY for me.
So no, you don’t have to feel happy all the time. Remember this.
Your purpose and desires are already captured within yourself. Letting them out is hard for some people but necessary for each one of us.
Journaling can be your trusted friend when life gets hard and confusing. So don’t be afraid to grab a journal and start writing about the things you want. Nobody has to read it ever, not even you (if you don’t feel like it.)
Keep in mind your tastes and wants may change over time and THAT’S FINE.
Trust your gut always and be willing to put in the work needed to bring your desires to life.
You don’t need to feel happy 100% of the time. Feeling pressured to feel happy every single minute of the day can actually hurt you!
Have you ever felt like this? Do you have a preferred technique to listen to your desires closely? Let me know in the comments!